What's on Pat Riley's mind?

And other Southeastern questions

We know what Pat is thinking, he took up an entire Dan LeBatard show talking about as much.

We tuned in per usual to hear news about Our Fins, Kelly’s Fins, big Fin-Head, that Kelly, go Big Dolphs. Instead, had to listen to Pat Riley talk about his NBA team for two-plus hours.

The NBA? This is Miami!

Can’t we end this?

MIAMI

Can we settle the Butler Scenario without further anguish?

May we call it ‘The Butler Scenario?’ Imagine Elmore Leonard vigorously scribbling through that title before moving down toward a much better one.

The LeBatard interview is typically compelling. I recommend every bit of it but in small doses throughout a day or week or maybe not maybe never at all.

I took it in one swipe and trust me, when sitting through shit like this …

“And so players’ personalities today, the younger generation is just different than it was when I grew up. I grew up, and I think most of us my age, at a time when our parents were harder if we had them. If we had what they would call the nuclear family. It was hard, but it was different. There was, even if it was a stone cold house, there was love there. We had a place to go home every night and there were two parents that cared about you, that provided for you. Maybe they didn’t love you like you wanted them to love you, but it was different. I’m not saying today’s player is not that, but it was harder and we understood that.”

… it makes a listener want to scream YOUR BEST IDEA WAS TERRY ROZIER THIS HAS NOTHING TO DO WITH A WOOD FURNACE.

Riley went on to realign Jesus’ whole render-unto-Caesar mic drop with Pat’s own, um, intersecting purposes. I didn’t find it appropriate for basketball discussion, even in the context of Pat Riley’s career, merely a basketball career full of basketball things, even if Pat slips between plain sandals or purple toga depending on the event. He has been exactly this extra the entire time.

Riley isn’t incorrect about Butler showing up to work as a good scout. It is as exasperating to watch Jimmy Butler attempt to play sly with a subordinate at the coffee shop as it is spending an afternoon listening to Pat Riley line up complaints like so many Roman columns as Riley carefully and soulfully answers thoughtful and at times difficult questions from someone who knows him well.

Butler never got to be the jock in the hallway or big man on campus, not even a celebrated NBA rookie, or the sort of sophomore fans think all summer about. After he became a star, the Bulls dealt him with a first-round pick back to a coach he thought he was done with. Out of 30 teams, they had to send him to Thibs and they knew what they were doing when they did it and Jimmy knew they knew he knew they knew what they were doing when they did it.

Butler’s spent the rest of his career overcorrecting, to the point of pretending to enjoy Michelob Ultra or thinking Mark Wahlberg is funny on Mark’s own, but when Mark means to be.

I get over it the minute I watch Butler slink up for a spindly jumper, 16-feet away from the rim, nine-feet from where he’s supposed to attempt it.

Do I like him because he’s the last of the players who will two-point-attempt teams right out of the championship? No, three-pointers are good, I place no expectation nor personal symbolism upon Butler’s shoulders.

Nah, I like him because I can’t help it, and that’s when you know you really like someone.

The Heat? They made it clear they are not trading Jimmy Butler and they would not lie to me. There are no deals here. They may trade Jimmy Butler, but they’re not dealing him. Miami won’t hand some other team the two-pointers it needs for a title.

ATLANTA

How do the Hawks stay around .500?

By alternating looks. Sometimes the Hawks (21-19, No. 8 in the East) look way better than Atlanta’s record, and in equal amounts the Hawks appear lucky to be winning half the time. That’s when us outside observers want to credit the Hawks for a good try against the odds.

Those odds? Atlanta is at 50/50, always, even if the club’s Net Rating (No. 20, well behind Miami, Indiana and Detroit) suggests the second take was correct. Especially if takers tuned in last Tuesday, when the Hawks needed the sixth-longest game-winner in NBA history to prevail over a Utah Jazz team trying to lose.

Don’t tune in now, Trae Young is out with a bruised rib, David Roddy started in Wednesday’s win over Chicago, All-Star’ish Hawks forward Jalen Johnson is out and Vic Krejci is in. The Hawks miss Larry Nance Jr. sopping minutes and yes the Hawks did notice the part where DeAndre Hunter (out for two games and counting) clunked 12-16 three-pointers in two games at the Lakers and Clipper arena (he hit 9-15 in the three games surrounding that turn) before injuring his foot.

The Hawks rely more on the three-pointer with Johnson out, which brings this outsider back to the same, lame, point: Trae Young takes an awful lot of three-pointers for a fella hitting 34 percent of them.

Now, Trae’s live dribble threat opens everything up for the Hawks, his 12.2 assists lead the league, but the Hawks sure do lose an edge in the charts when Young (a career 35-percent three-point maker, topping out at 38 percent in 2023) takes 8.6 threes per night to make 2.9 per night. The amount of lifts doesn’t offend, he ranks in the 40s in three-point attempts per 100 possessions, in between Moses Moody and Darius Garland. But it is five clangs per game.

He’s 26, and if Trae develops Steph Strength over the summer and returns in 2025-26 as a 40 percent shooter, Young will and should earn MVP acknowledgement.

The Hawks trashed Chicago in Chicago on Wednesday after splitting a Phoenix-to-Atlanta home-and-home and, yes, “splitting a Phoenix-to-Atlanta home-and-home” sounds like the name of a type of mid-1970s Key Party.

The team has potential Sixth Man (Hunter) and Rookie (Zaccharie Risacher, bum hip) award-winners out, plus the franchise player, plus a potential All-Star in Jalen Johnson.

And it won Wednesday with a 25-year old two-way rookie, Keaton Wallace, playing out of his mind.

Alternating looks.

ORLANDO

How many more losses?

Several days off from Sunday’s win over Philadelphia and the best the Magic could do on Wednesday was fall faceward while visiting Bucks, 122-93. Paolo Banchero with 22 points on 20 shots in his third, worst, game back from injury.

Jalen Suggs’ back injury on Jan. 3 was bad, looked rough, the Magic can’t have him overcompensating on legs and grinding wheels while minding his mending rear discs. The team is 3-4 in his absence, winning in Toronto on the night of his fall and clamping the Knicks in MSG three days later, plus that win over the hapless Sixers. The Magic fell at home to the Jazz, Timberwolves, and Bucks, plus Wednesday’s loss in Wisconsin.

The Magic visit Boston on Friday, the Celtics similarly chagrined after Wednesday’s loss to Toronto. Orlando hosts Denver on Sunday before visiting Toronto on Tuesday, not an easy few days. Welcomes Portland and Detroit to home before a six-game road trip begins Jan. 27.

Similar to Suggs, Franz Wagner can’t pogo back from the oblique injury he’s nearer to return from, needing “conditioning” first, per the team. Banchero looks good but Kentavious Caldwell-Pope successfully suits up through a sore knee he should probably sit, Goga Bitadze sometimes grits through a bum hip when he can, and Jett Howard’s recent entry into NBA relevance was hamstrung by an ankle turn.

There is an Orlando Magic assistant coach named “Dale Osbourne” and yeah it gives me pause every time.

This outrageous array of Orlando injuries could keep a good club down, the Magic are 23-19 and No. 5 in the East but in danger of falling past the Pacers, Pistons and Hawks, each surging and 1.5 games behind Orlando. If Miami (two games behind Orlando) or Philly (6.5) ever got its act together, they could clang.

Jalen Suggs is the one setback the Magic cannot endure.

CHARLOTTE

Why are we doing nothing with the last of our legacy?

Charlotte hides its beautiful teal behind two massive pinstripes and a pointed font which frightens nobody. If the rebuilding must take this long, can we at least de-aggro the uniforms?

LaMelo Ball’s usage was down slightly in his first three games since his return from a left calf injury, to the rate of the second-highest usage in the NBA and not first (by a lot).

With Ball back the Hornets showed well in a loss against Cleveland on Jan. 5. Two nights later Charlotte did what Charlotte should do at home to an aging Suns team which worked in Philadelphia the night before, creating Charlotte’s first win since Dec. 8.

Ball needed 28 shots to score 32 points in the Suns victory, Brandon Miller shot 5-16 with zero free throws, so what, the defense tightened to the point where an outside observer can credit better choices on offense, fewer turnovers and one or two less of the long rebounds starting breaks.

This company is crawling out of something hideous, these aren’t habits to behold or sustain, but as Tom Ziller explained, Ball is about all the Hornets have. That is why the Suns earned revenge in Phoenix against the Hornets on Sunday. “Phoenix-and-Charlotte home-and-home” only sounds like a minor insurance fraud scheme.

Wednesday with the Jazz, Ball contributed only 21 field goal attempts against Utah, Jordanesque, with 27 points and nine assists and six boards and most importantly, a road win.

Center Mark Williams played a season-high 36 minutes (see below) and led the team in scoring with 31 points, Brandon Miller tied for his fourth-most free throw attempts in a 2024-25 game, with four.

LaMelo Ball was raised to do this, promoted and bolstered by the Hornets his entire career, I hate the way he drives off the court but I’m inclined to give him the gentle treatment between the lines.

BELOW

Charlotte made a trade on Wednesday, letting Nick Richards wander his way to Phoenix (with a second-round pick) for veteran swingman Josh Okogie and three second-round picks. Please don’t ever care about when or from where those second-round draft picks come from.

Josh Okogie makes only $7.75 million next season at age 27, that money is non-guaranteed, the Hornets can deal him again by Feb. 6 or on draft night or keep the savings.

Josh recently fell out of the the Suns’ rotation (they have a lot of guys at his position who are Kevin Durant). All manner of playoff clubs, strident to stooge, should consider having this guy under contract in spring and next season as superior third-string insurance, or occasional merely-OK two-way help.

Or to cut him.

For the Suns? Richards will swat a ton of shots and use elbows to clear boards and on offense he’ll just kick it, just wind up and kick a ball right out of bounds.

Nick was whapped in the ribs earlier this year but appears fully recovered, 28 dunks in 21 games and no he does not shoot threes. Sorry for being snippy, I’ve had to watch Hornet games, I’ve had to learn if Nick Richards sneaks out for the occasional baseline heave.

The move trims over $3 million from the Suns’ current payroll but over $22 million in luxury tax savings, and they’ll earn an eager big man whom the stars will want to work around. Nick Richards, surrounded by real veterans, at age 27? Good stuff. Some guys aren’t meant to waste away primes on rebuilding teams, some guys aren’t meant to be Ben Simmons.

Taj Gibson worked seven minutes for Charlotte in the Utah win and fouled twice, one defensive rebound, nothing else, champion. I am looking forward to Gibson’s rotation re-establishment and encourage others to tune in. Friday’s contest in Chicago will be Charlotte’s third game in ten days, the Hornets had time to practice and they want to earn a second look.

WASHINGTON

When will the Wizards give fans something beyond lottery cynicism?

A year? Next March? Two years from now?

Wiz fans cheer for every defeat and Wiz fans should, high draft picks are the best way to move the bad players you don’t like off your favorite, terrible, team.

High draft picks are also the best way for mid-market teams to bounce up in the standings, but even presuming a precocious turn from whichever Wizard wins Rookie of the Year in 2025-26, what will it matter?

Adding repeated bits of Brogdon and Valančiūnas to the mix in 2024-25 hasn’t done anything for Washington’s 30/30/30 (offense/defense/net rating) numbers, the team loses by an average of 14 per game, which would be a record for a club not helmed by both Richie Abubato and Gar Heard.

Much like the Thunder, in-season internal development should turn this around a little. Washington is already mostly competitive occasionally, later in the 2024-25 season the Wizards could be sometimes competitive every so often.

It is an impressive commitment, the Wizards play the kids until it hurts, but you watch Alex Sarr lose his guy and you wouldn’t want it any other way. Not for the loss, the lottery odds, but for the valuable experience you got to witness on the way toward turning the channel to another NBA game. Bilal Coulibaly is the sort of player who learns better burnt, and I never see Kyshawn George or Bub Carrington glaring at the ground, waiting for February to flip.

Of course, this month has two weeks left, 15 days. Yes, Bub, there are 31 days in this stupid month.

We’re tired of skipping over this team, we need a reason for it to matter again.

FOR THE GOOD TIMES

Hey how are you I love you be warm thank you for reading.

PREVIOUSLY: Down there, up there, in the middle there.