Ol' blue and orange is back

New York wins the trade deadline, others participate

The Knicks won over the NBA by convincing the world that second-round picks are real, which they are not, before pouncing on the worst team at its worstest. If the Detroit Pistons don’t immolate and hang onto Bojan Bogdanovic and Alec Burks years later than Detroit shoulda hung on, New York doesn’t win the trade deadline.

But Detroit does stink, only returning two second-round picks and a Knick (Quentin Grimes) the Knicks didn’t want. The Knicks were patient and slicked the trade deadline. The Knicks and GM Leon Rose and whatever other cufflink and cologne-types New York has in the front office alongside the associate nerds, the smartypants who told the ex-agents running the Knicks to hang tight and wait for the favors and phone calls to roll in.

The nerds learned about favors? Scratching backs and such? We’re doomed. The Knicks look steady, smart, sagacious, the NBA is wackier than ever.

Bogdanovic (20 per game on 47-41-77) turns 35 in April and makes a little over $19 million next season in the final year of his contract. Burks (12.6 points per game, 40 percent on threes, 46 percent in January) is a former Knick and Seinfeld foil, working under the final year of his deal in 2023-24.

The Knicks traded for Bojan but also a rested All-Star, Bogdanovic replaces Julius Randle, able to recover from injury without worry. A steal in any market. Until Randle returns, Bojan runs circles around defenses for a few months as the Knicks dribble and hand-off and hand-off and dribble. If Bogdanovic falters next season, in the final year of his deal, so what. Bojan can defend when he concentrates, too, I promise. Tom Thibodeau does, too.

The wheels may fall of Alec Burks any minute, but he may also hit 48 percent of his three-pointers in a classic seven-game Eastern finals. The 32-year old started slow in 2023-24 before regaining his effectiveness, and trade market charms. Not too much for the Knicks to handle, a sensible addition if coach Thibodeau doesn’t overuse Alec in the postseason.

In February? Go nuts. OG Anunoby needs to be darn sure with his elbow surgery (and expected three-week rehabilitation) or else New York’s postseason hopes are Goodbye, Mr. Chips. Randle is out, Grimes and Immanuel Quickley aren’t around to dribble into scores, and Jalen Brunson recently re-arranged the right ankle he jumps off.

The Pistons picked Bojan up before 2022-23 and signed him to a cap-friendly extension soon after, Detroit passed the 2023 trade deadline, the 2023 NBA draft and 2023 offseason without dealing him for a first-round pick. The chance for Bogdanovic and Burks to return first-round pick passed sometime in fall, well before Detroit’s 29th loss in 31 tries.

In Grimes, the Pistons acquire a motivated two-way guard with starter potential, for a team which with Jaden Ivey already at his position.

Quentin Grimes is already better than the nebulous idea of a first-round return for Bojan and/or Burks (even with the Pistons drafting), but that still doesn’t make up for sitting on the veteran pair, especially when Grimes is eligible-extension this summer. The Pistons didn’t get to live off Quentin’s rookie contract, as they would any first-round picks returned for Bojan and/or Burks.

Evan Fournier’s expiring contract (a team option for next season) heads to Detroit. The Pistons also receive Malachi Flynn (final year of his rookie deal) who rebounds and passes and does not make shots, he’ll expire this summer regardless of what the guard (26 in May) does with Burks’ old minutes.

Ryan Arcidiacono also heads to Detroit where he’ll fit right in, Ryan worked 45 minutes for the Knicks this season and failed to make a shot in six attempts from the floor. Yet they waived Killian Hayes for this guy.

DALLAS DEALS FOR DANIEL GAFFORD

If Dereck Lively is Gallant, Gafford will be Gafford. Not quite Goofus. Slams and jams instead of entering a doorway ahead of a lady, or leaving the water running while brushing his teeth.

Daniel Gafford is no championship answer but he’s something, anything to make plays, put numbers in the box score. After so many years of Dwight Powell and Maxi Kleber, this is someone to dunk and rebound. Gafford slips into providing as shitty a brand of defense as Christian Wood at times but because Daniel dunks and blocks and rebounds, Jason Kidd will be well-pleased.

He should be, Gafford is twice the all-around player Wood is, blocks and rebounds count as “defense,” dunks are cool, Gafford makes the other team work. He will live above the rim alongside Luka and Kyrie Irving, and only in exchange for Richaun Holmes.

Holmes has a player option he’ll pick up (thank you, Sacramento) for 2024-25 at $12.87 million. Gafford makes slightly more than this in 2024-25 and $14.3 million in 2025-26, figuring to bounce well through the end of the deal, expiring ahead of Gafford’s age-28 season.

The Wizards receive Oklahoma City’s 2024 first-round pick in the deal, OKC wanted nothing to do with its pick in this iffy draft. Oklahoma City receives 2028 first-round swap rights with Dallas in exchange, which could become a crucial caveat.

DALLAS TRADES ITS 2027 FIRST-ROUND PICK

For P.J. Washington. No star, yet better than what they’ll get for an average first-round pick. The pick is top-two protected, Dallas also gives up Grant Williams and Seth Curry, off to Charlotte.

The Mavericks’ bullpen is by committee, Lively is the rookie closer but the club wants all sorts of arms to man the frontcourt as it grooves its way into the playoffs. Dallas (No. 8 in the West, only a few wins removed from a certain postseason spot) is a win-now club, Irving isn’t any younger than he was yesterday, Luka Dončić isn’t becoming less exasperated, let’s throw P.J. Washington and Daniel Gafford at ‘em and see what the hitters come up with.

If Washington isn’t thinking about his shots, Dallas plucked a major contributor.

If Washington (in the first year of a three-year, $46 million deal which declines in average, $15.5 million next season and $14.1 the next) mulls his future with every three-point launch, Washington will be troubled. Half P.J.’s shots come from three-point range, the 36 percent career shooter hit 32.8 percent in Charlotte this season. Misses get to his defense.

Still, better than Powell, better than Grant Williams, Derrick Jones Jr. (starting, gamely, but no bueno) and le aforementioned Mr. Kleber.

Grant never looked like a fit in Dallas, he wasn’t, and the price for removing the final three-plus seasons on his four-year, $53.3 million deal is that pick. Charlotte will happily take upon Williams, he can start and isn’t embarrassed to look out of place in any lineup. Tradeable contract, arguable two-way quality, not a millstone in the making (at less than nine percent of the expected cap) even if the deal drags until 2027.

Seth Curry is 33 and down to 36 percent from deep this season but the Hornets have a 2024-25 team option on the Duke product for only $4 million, for a real-life basketball player. Which Seth, when the Hornets have the ball at least, is.

Washington could be rather major for Dallas but it is up to the big fella, playing with Kidd and Luka will frustrate P.J. and he has to live up to his billing, let alone the first-round pick tagger-oo.

THUNDERHORNETS

Oklahoma City needs rebounding, badly, and Gordon Hayward corrals loose balls. If OKC can keep him on the active list, he’ll be a mainstay. The Thunder were supersmart to deal for Charlotte’s forward, pay for the final bits of Hayward’s $31.5 million this season, eschew the wiles of the buyout market, cash in on someone who can board, ball. Screen, pass, shoot.

Gordon Hayward is good, he spaces the floor (36 percent from deep this season, 37 percent career), and Hayward can find a lot of places in Oklahoma City to get that haircut.

The Thunder had to give up Vasilije Micic, whom I like a lot and don’t want to waste on a club like Charlotte. Micic (a rookie who turned 30 in January) may not have a place in a modern playoff rotation, fine, I would prefer OKC to buck that trend. Micic is a second quarter guy, I love second quarter guys. Show me some leg when the stars sit.

Tre Mann, still just 23 and off to the Hornets, also intrigues. It is a drag they will be in Charlotte, a franchise seeking to extend Miles Bridges this offseason despite Bridges’ history of domestic abuse and utter NBA interchangeability (Bridges recently dropped two 40-plus point games, which ranks him behind P.J. Washington on Charlotte’s all-time list of 40-point efforts). NBA fans are lucky Bridges plays for such an irrelevant club, and Hornets fans deserves so much better after a quarter-century of front office fucktivity. It takes so little to make a stand, so imagine what we think of the Charlotte Hornets.

The Hornets pick up Micic because they’ll take on the final year of Dāvis Bertāns’ contract (now fully guaranteed at $16 million) in 2024-25. Charlotte also acquires two second-round picks for the effort.

PHILLY CALLS DETROIT

The Sixers needed roster spots and the Pistons were like “don’t Google his name just yet, but we just traded for Evan Fournier,” so Philly sent a second-round pick and Danuel House Jr. to Detroit.

The second-round selection is the Knicks’, who would be smart to take a look at House (with OG Anunoby smarting and room below the tax) if he is bought out.

DENIS DENIS

The Raptors picked up Dennis Smith Jr. (a defensive sprite who can rise up) from Brooklyn, alongside the rights to pay Dennis Smith Jr. next season, in exchange for letting loose Dennis Schröder and the $13 million owed on Schröder’s contract in 2024-25. Toronto also acquired (and released, avoiding a $1.5 million contract bonus), Spencer Dinwiddie.

Schröder plays hard, 13 points and seven assists in 30 minutes with Toronto, True Shooting above his career marks, the Nets are two games out of the Eastern play-in but Dennis can help with little shoves.

March and April are always a mess, there ware wins to pull for Toronto, too. The Raptors have yet to win a divisional game after 11 tries but are four games out of the play-in, working with a weird, little chance at taking this odd roster to the playoffs. For a game.

SUNS AND NETS AND GRIZZLIES

We applauded every one of Phoenix’s summertime selections because, after the new owner gave up all his picks and players for Kevin Durant (before pushing all-in on the redundant Bradley Beal), what exactly was GM James Jones to do? And if any hit, then we’d have a win.

Well, now they are out of every pick. And Chimezie Metu, Keita Bates-Diop, and Jordan Goodwin didn’t make the Suns rotation, it turns out.

None hit, no wins, Phoenix (fifth in the West) lost and will now try to make up for it in the rapidly aging form of Royce O’Neale, who turns 31 in June and hit 36.6 percent of his threes in Brooklyn this season. O’Neale’s contract expires this summer, the Suns hope his legs make it that long.

David Roddy is off to Phoenix and if David Roddy (8.4 points per game on eight shots per game) has to space the floor for any of the Sun superstars, Phoenix is in trouble. He is a strong talent who hasn’t run with NBA legs yet. The Suns are correct to take a chance on Roddy until he’s less grotty ($2.87 million next season, team option for just over $4 million in 2025-26), but only if they don’t expect much out of the gate.

Goodwin has a team option for next season, he is capable only in the severest situations. Metu gets to the line a ton and Bates-Diop is under contract for next season (presuming Keita pulls at his player option) at a rather appropriate $2.65 million. The Nets earned two second-round picks from Phoenix for taking this option on.

The Grizzlies return Yuta Watanabe in this three-way, which is fun. Getting off Roddy’s contract probably helps, slightly, even if Roddy does round into a rotation player on a good team, Memphis made its conclusion.

BUCKS AND SIXERS DO EACH OTHER A FAVOR

We know the Sixers want to ruin the Bucks, but this form is surprising.

Pat Beverley appeared established in Philadelphia but Sixers GM Daryl Morey punted Pat to a decades-long rival in exchange for Cameron Payne, and there is no way Daryl Morey enjoys Cameron Payne.

Payne shoots 54 percent on his twos this season, far and away his best NBA mark, and 40 percent on threes, well above his 36.7 percent career percentage. If this accuracy sustains in Philadelphia, big win, anything’s better than Shake Milton. Or George Hill. Jerryd Bayless.

The Sixers also pick up a 2027 second-round pick which will be fun to recall in three years after Beverley steers Milwaukee into an opening round playoff exit this spring.

BUCKS TRADE THE REAL KING

Robin Lopez was traded to Sacramento and immediately waived in a cost-cutting moved for all involved. Including Robin, unfortunately, waived by Sacramento, cannot re-sign with the Bucks.

If you’d ask any of us in 2018 which defensive-minded Lopez twin would be the first to be eased out of the NBA, we would have answered, “trick question, there is only one defensive-minded Lopez twin” before asking questions about the future — if the long-retired Brook Lopez had his own animation studio by 2024, which way Trump ended up dying, Super Bowl winners, the usual.

Then you’d tell us Brook Lopez was the defensive lynchpin of the 2021 NBA champions and I’d ask if they moved the rim down to eight feet or something.

SIXERS SPRING SPRINGER ON THE CELTICS

The Celtics need warm bodies to fill a bench and the 76ers, who want Boston to lose, need to cut roster spots for potential free agent signings. So Philly sent Jaden Springer to Boston for a second-round pick.

Jaden Springer was on the Sixers.

Springer is no star but he can sop up a few minutes between now and April and not embarrass himself checking in out of nowhere and into a playoff game.

But the Celtics should check him back into nowhere as soon as Boston can.

CELTICS SEND PERSON TO PORTLAND

Dalano Banton did not help the Celtics but he plays hard and the Blazers can use him, move everyone up a position with Shaedon Sharpe out.

Why give up a second-round pick for a 24-year old who shoots 37 percent? Because second-round picks do not exist.

UTAH AND TORONTO TRADE WITS

Toronto ends up with Kelly Olynyk for the price of 2024 first-round pick, Raptors securing swingman Ochai Agbaji in the process.

The hep thing to do is deal for Bird Rights. The ability to re-sign Olynyk is worth a guaranteed first-round salary slot Toronto didn’t want, the 29th-projected pick (worst of Utah, Houston, the Clippers’ or Thunder’s) Toronto sent Utah.

Raptors GM Masai Ujiri can’t claim to be the only person in the NBA to know Ochai Agbaji’s game inside-out. Ujiri knows Ochai’s dad, cool, but Agbaji also played all four seasons at Utah and over 2200 minutes of NBA basketball since he was selected No. 14 in the 2022 draft. There’s tape out on this guy, Agbaji turns 24 in April and hasn’t hit yet. Can he turn into a mini-Anunoby? Only Agbaji’s dad knows.

Ujiri considers Agbaji’s final two seasons of team control worth a super-low first-round pick in a crummy draft, understandable if Agbaji’s initial two seasons weren’t so underwhelming.

The Jazz pick up Kira Lewis Jr. and Otto Porter, expiring contracts, and pull a first-round pick for two players they didn’t want nor need.

We also acted, inspired poetry, and looked out for LGBTQ rights.

MONTE MORRIS TO MINNESOTA

To Detroit in exchange for Troy Brown (under contract next season for $5 million), Shake Milton ($4 million) and a 2030 second-round pick. Sorry Troy, Shake.

Can Monte Morris still play? I’m willing to discount his limited Piston stats (36 percent shooting in 68 minutes spread over six, recent, games) as an unavoidable consequence springing from his prevailing back injury, but, “prevailing back injury.”

Morris isn’t old, 29 in June. The expectation is that the turnover-every-three-months-Monte will hop right off the Wolves bench with the same precision displayed during his finer moments with Denver. It may take a while, until spring, for Morris to shake the rust off.

Morris was perfectly Monte-like in his single 2022-23 season with Washington and turned the ball over only twice in those 68 minutes with Detroit. He dished eight dimes in Detroit, which is about what prime Magic Johnson would manage in 68 minutes with the woebegone 2023-24 Pistons, provided Magic brought Kareem.

Minnesota had no backup point guard, and Monte Morris was the most obvious backup point guard on the market, Minnesota went and got him for two players who, combined, mostly caused frustration.

Troy Brown (who was his usual self in Minnesota) and Shake Milton (same, sadly) had moments, the Wolves were willing to be surprised by Brown and weren’t, but Brown played well for long stretches, that usual self, ask Wizard fans, Bulls and Laker backers. Minnesota engaged with expectations for Milton, no dice. Each weren’t abhorrent but they were out of the rotation, as Minnesota (36-16, tied for tops in the West) moves along.

Ex-Nuggets GM and current Wolves GM Tim Connelly drafted Morris for the Nuggets in 2017, he trusts him with his locker room, it’s almost a wonder Monte made it to February with Detroit. Connolly must have wanted to see some lumbar first.

PACERS DEAL BUDDY HIELD TO PHILLY

The Pacers traded Hield to Philly, the Sixers sent two warm bodies and three hypothetical ice cubes (a second-round pick in 2024 and two in 2029 ). Furkan Korkmaz (out of the 76ers rotation) to the Pacers and Marcus Morris Sr. (until recently crucial to the Sixers rotation) to San Antonio and waived, Korkmaz remains in Indy to replicate Hield’s ability to let three different positions blow by him and score.

Hield’s defense was a problem for the Pacers, the league’s 26th-ranked outfit on that end. His shooting was solid enough (38 percent from deep this season, 42 last year) and Hield never stopped moving on offense (that’s where the buckets are), helping tilt the Pacers’ top-ranked scoring and efficiency marks. That Morris (40 percent from deep with the 76ers) is actually better at connecting on three-pointers than Hield in 2023-24 is the trade’s ha-ha moment.

But Hield draws so much attention, he is due to shoot 44 percent from long range in any NBA month, but doesn’t always loiter beyond the arc, Hield creates looks and continues moving. Morris did no such thing, Korkmaz didn’t play, nobody needs second-round picks — let alone another team’s second-round picks — the three second-rounders heading to Indiana come from Portland (2029), Toronto (2024) and the Clippers (2029).

Hield could absolutely rupture Philly’s good-time defense (11th currently, addled in Joel Embiid’s absence) but this is in exchange for creation. Philadelphia needs something to survive the next two months, with and without Embiid.

Buddy could blow up as a Sixer and still sit out crucial postseason moments, fine with Philly, Morey gave up nothing to get Hield (who turned 31 in December) and Buddy is a free agent in the offseason. The Sixers also popped open a roster spot, and Hield moves Kelly Oubre Jr. to the bench where Oubre can gobble steals, seal broke plays with a flush, feast on second-tier supporters. Hield is unflappable, he’ll run his act in the face of starters or scrubs.

As Indiana attempts addition by subtraction by addition. Korkmaz isn’t finished, he’s only 27 and can ably approximate Hield’s off-ball antics before tiring himself and missing the shot.

SPURS LEND INDIANA A NEW BUDDY

San Antonio sends ex-Pacer Doug McDermott back to Indiana (the Hield affair is a three-team deal) but Doug McDermott is no Buddy Hield.

McDermott (now an ex-Spur) can’t launch quickly enough, can’t stay on the court. A better shooter and dunker, to be sure, acquired for zero cost, able to man positions Buddy cannot. But no Buddy. Different.

Better? We’ll find out. Indiana did work, catch me at the Dunk Contest on Saturday.

THERE WAS ANOTHER PACER TRADE

Seriously?

Cory Joseph and $5.8 million to Indiana for a second-round pick, and to save the Warriors $3.75 in total luxury tax savings.

WE GOTTA STOP SAYING “AND PICKS”

Second-round picks are not picks. They are raffle tickets. Not currency. Nobody gets on the bus with a second-round pick.

There are no “pretty good” second-round picks. It is a commercial movement, the Live Mas approach, embracing the likelihood of second-round success and selling a day-long second-round to ESPN and full-sugar pop companies for us to consume when we should be outside, in June, drinking full-sugar pop.

DON’T BLAME IT ON YOUR WIFE

This is such a weird song but it might be the reason my marriage sustains. Our farm flopped terribly. Turns out you need different tractors for different crops, plus the cows wouldn’t get out of the way.

TOMORROW: Bulls and Warriors and Lakers and everyone else too nervous to deal on Thursday.

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